Hans takes you to a post-apocalyptic world where you, a sentient watermelon, dream to reunite with humanity through excessive parkour attempts. This rage-trigger game doesn’t handhold, mainly because watermelons don’t have hands. So don’t get comfortable expecting a save button! Learn from your failures and defy physics to climb the endless unstable infrastructure left by the wake of the end.

Is Hans The New Impossible Game?

This juicy challenge comes at you in a low-poly 3D world, think Roblox Obbys but with lore. Hans is the freak remnant of twisted science who gets to explore this interesting aftermath on his search for companionship. As the living summer snack, you only want to keep traversing up to meet with the surviving crusaders who took off to the stars. Floating forests and tilted skyscrapers obstruct your path spaceward, though surely this is hardly a strange sight to an immortal watermelon that doesn’t explode when impacting the ground from a previous altitude of 10,000 feet…

If you’re a bit of a sadist you’ll likely enjoy this game. Difficult is an understatement for how tricky the stunts are to perform. You know, since you’re a melon who is bound by realistic movement physics. Hans can, however, slow down time which offers an edge during some of the more tricky jumps. I interrogated a watermelon in my kitchen to see if this is universal, but it wouldn’t share any secrets…

Live Laugh Melon

The trick to Hans is to become one with melon-kind to the concerning point of getting it engraved into your passport. Hopefully, melons hold less rage than humans since the frustration of Hans is no joke! If you bought this game following this news and punched your monitor it is not my fault! Did I mention you can also customize Hans on your adventure making all your hostility a little more worthwhile?

Hans launched today over on Steam. Be sure to check out the game for more details and support the DEV. If you need to take a break from spitting seeds in anger you can check out some of our other news that takes you to space. Stunning Retro-Futuristic Sci-Fi The Invincible Out Next Week.